Whose life is it anyway?

Conscientious Joyful Living, does it reflect me or what. lol

The lower 6 examinations are finally over. As Gandhi once put it, it always seems impossible until it is done. Nothing is impossible, except for the things that we have chosen not to do yet.

SMKC’s choir won 4th place. Well, at least it was better than last year. CDQ was kind enough to burn a copy of the entire choir competition event for me. All I had to do was collect it from Pn CHe Ma.

Pn Che Ma wasn’t at home when I first rang her door. Apparently she went to Shah Alam with her husband to watch a real hantu exhibition. Ghosts spooks, and the smell of death, nothing disturbs me more.

Which reminds me of the front page of Star 2 on Monday, which was filled with caricatures of hantu of manifold religion and beliefs. Amusingly unnerving, one which looked novel to me was the hantu puchong. Apparently this specific hantu was always wrapped in white cloth. The hantus will have 2 months of holidays? gee.. where did that come from

Recently I"ve come to derive joy from knowledge again. And nothing inspires me more than this picture

Yep, its a picture captured by hubble’s deep space magnification telescope. This is certainly beyond the descriptive abilities of mere words.. all these galaxies.. each illuminating glow a galaxy with trillions of stars… there is so much to learn! don’t u just get excited?

And consider the humble text books which adorn our table, with magnificient pages of information carefully researched and crafted by benevolent individuals who equated each subtopic as their live’s work. With the hope that someone else would use its knowledge and change the world for the better, yet how we sometimes find them a burden, a bothersome, cumbersome, obstacle towards the goal post of social recognition……

I would like to quote Guy Kiyosaki’s presentation. " There are 3 ways to make meaning in life - to increase the quality of life, to right a wrong, and to prevent the end of something good" How very true. For our goals to be truly meaningful then, they ought to derive certain common denominators with the mentioned 3. That aside, Guy Kiyosaki’s presentation was downright awesome. I really respect that guy for being such a good public speaker, and I certainly seek to learn from him. Don’t know what I"m talking about? check this out http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-3755718939216161559

From his presentation too I realized a critical flawed paradigm within myself - the constant harping of creating the perfect mission statement. I’m truly grateful for such newfound knowledge.

Recently, another spindle of life that has caught my eye are the 7 deadly sins. What are the 7 deadly sins? check this out http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Seven_deadly_sins as I was reading the wiki article, and as my eyes rolled down the 7 great imperfections of men, my heart resonated with something. Yep, no wonder life stinks at times. Surprisingly it is able to serve as an excellent and simple guideline to better oneself. And its certainly more specific than the golden rule.

Mm. I finished watching the choir competition recordings. CBN wasn’t really that awesome.. their rendition of over the rainbow was actually quite pitchy, and their medley - think of me fondly, remember me.. blablabla.. was actually quite amusing in the sense that they were indirectly singing to the judges to THINK OF ME FONDLY, and REMEMBER ME.. and it was like so ugh… they won.. LoL

VI was good as usual, but this time they seemed to have overdid it perhaps.. something just didn’t click.. maybe it was the weather that day, positive songs had a fairer chance of winning… St Mary.. wow.. SO colourful, I am so speechless because they look like they just robbed bill gates, made him bankrupt and stuck all his money on themselves as costumes.. SMKC was well, aihz. the song selection.. the oomph just wasn’t there. and then there was the school I forgot what’s its name.. they were quite passionate and amusing as they sang.. MALAYSIA SUDAH BERJAYA, MALAYSIA BERJAYA, MAAAALAAAYSIIAAAA BERJAYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.. and then next they sang - Sing a song of sixpence a pocket full of thyme? LOL they mambo jamboed the nursery rhyme into a godzilla.. it sounded so funny especially when it came to the part of the rhyme when they were supposed to sing " the birds began to Sing!!!!!!!!!!!" THey literally pulled the ’sing’ syllable up and down 5000 piano octaves with a frequency of 10284129750197 hertz.. lol.. in conclusion.. the lesson learnt is.. emotion sells.. emotion was lacking.. in my opinion, of the other 4 choirs.. but the CBN really meant it when they sang to THINK OF ME and REMEMBER ME FONDLY.. it struck a chord with the audience and obviously the judges.. so I guess, as circumstances and the weather would have it.. they deserved to win.

I’ve recently wondered why I tend to shake my leg whenever I’m running certain thought processes in my brain. It seems, that when I understand something in class or get excited, I shake my leg.. and I notice my classmates doing that too, especially the smart ones.. so doesn’t that tell u something? LOL.. My explanation is that because the leg muscles are the biggest in the body, the rapid contraction and subsequent relaxation of the muscles activate the myoglobin in the muscles which stores oxygen, does resulting in an oxygen demand which seems to increase metabolism as well as a certain amount of dopamine release into the brain.. normally leg shaking stops when the discomfort of lactic acid build up  cancels out the pleasurable feelings from the dopamine effect.. so then, I suppose you can judge to a certain degree, the energy level for learning in a class by the frequency its students shake their legs? LoLOoLOlOlol.. pure speculations of course.. imaginary. Yet, when they are mixed with pieces of facts.. they become complex.. (think complex numbers: imaginary number + real number) an excellent example being the da vinci code.. how it has managed to play on this human feature so well to make the entire literary world dance to its tune.

http://www.chemsoc.org/timeline/pages/timeline.html

Another website filled with thought provoking imagery. A cancer fighting drug.. Imatinib.. wow, enzymes are key players in biology indeed

To sum it all up, I know I’ve flunked the monthly test. But I have discovered myself.. which was there all along.. because believing is seeing, after all.

An interesting weekend it was, filled with insights and paradigm shifts. The only thing that bugs me now is my unfinished homework. Oh dear. Anyway.

On Friday, I was priviledged enough to be entrusted by Mr Chin to the school piano. So upon completion of potato measuring in the biology laboratory, Darryn Jo Shua and I scuttled to the school hall. Carmen would join us later that day as she was having extra math lessons with Mrs Ng. The infamous piano room was as small as Yee Leng so atrociously described it. Like a giant rabbit hole on the wall with a door and padlock, piano room it is.

With a melodic snap of the padlock’s release, we were greeted by a piano, 2 floor fans, a piano chair, a piano chair platform, 2 electric sockets and a fluoresent light tube. The heat and humidity of the room was nefarious. But conditions improved when the piano was relocated outside. The piano, despite its rustic exterior and dusty interior, was of a fine quality and brand.

Darryn and Jo Shua could play the piano pretty well. Well, I wouldn’t expect anything less from anyone with grade 6 -8 in practical piano. Later Carmen joined us, and she could certainly churn out the most graceful tunes. In short, Lower 6 Kensett is generally very musically inclined. And I"m certainly convinced that their skills could be put to good use in music related competitions.

It is interesting to note that while we were hovering around the piano, several students from the upper 6 forms were practicing badminton. They were very skilled, and from the looks of it, they seem to fit the description of the few top badminton players of the school who frequently represent the school and state. It was very inspiring to watch them play.

Later that day I acquired a campbell 7th edition biology text book at the price of $83. The venue was Mukmin bookstore opposite Sogo.

On Saturday, I went to the Methodist College of Kuala Lumpur in order to attend a talk entitled Christianity and the Sciences, as well as Christianity and the Arts. It was simply awesome. The speakers were very well versed in their fields, and their presentations were insightful. I left MCKL that day with 7 pages of notes, and of course, yet a little wiser. Later that day we went to Shakey’s at Sungai Wang for lunch. It was the first time I went for an outing with my form 6 buddies. It was fun. Pizzas were yum too.

"I cannot conceive of a God who rewards and punishes his creatures, or has a will of the kind that we experience in ourselves. Neither can I nor would I want to conceive of an individual that survives his physical death; let feeble souls, from fear or absurd egoism, cherish such thoughts. I am satisfied with the mystery of the eternity of life and with the awareness and a glimpse of the marvelous structure of the existing world, together with the devoted striving to comprehend a portion, be it ever so tiny, of the Reason that manifests itself in nature."
[Albert Einstein,_The World as I See It_]

One among many quotes of Einstein from http://www.some-guy.com/quotes/einstein.html . I’m especially intrigued by Einstein’s mention of mystery, and the corelation with the fact that there is no such thing as scientific fact. If you ever doubt that, just consider that half of all the ’scientific facts’ widely accepted 25 years ago are now known to be false even by today’s kindergarden children. Since because of this, mystery is always present.

Mystery presents itself as a rather pallatable dish, filled with curiousity, and quenched only by truth.

The fluctuations of cocurriculum frenzy has finally reached an equilibrium. With 2 posts demanding leadership, 1 demanding financial skills and another 2 more demanding ‘followship’… yes I have not misspelled the word.. FOLLOWSHIP.. It feels awkward at times since I was so accustomed to leading. It deals well then that this experience should serve to expand my perspective.

I guess now, after all that’s been said and done, its time for homework.

All eyes on the game. Player A is losing like crazy despite having practiced with a frequency of 9218730197 hertz. The cameras gleefully capture every shot of downfall that permeates from player A. Meanwhile, victorious music play behind player B. Player A wished for a requiem…

In a society of castes, the intellectuals sit on everyone’s heads. Exerting a band of infinite displacement from everyone else, they often inspire nefarious stares and resentment. Expiring poison akin to sewer fumes and under the guise of humility, they subconsciously inject into anything living nearby - diminishment. Making them wish for a requiem…

I wish for a requiem, sometimes.

I wish I have something more inspiring to write at the moment but my mind is full of morbid stares. Happiness may be a state of mind but my mind isn’t exactly in a desirable state at the moment. Preparing for STPM takes planning, dedication, initiative, and hardwork. Yet how these things elude me. Racial statistics of local university admissions run me over like a truck. Yet how well I am still able to fake this motivation to study. Opportunities to affect change past me by. Yet how well I’m taking it. I feel like I’m choking, drowning in my own blood. Now I understand what Chan Kong meant about the feeling of drowning in the middle of an ocean…

It will be so easy if I just said,

I chose to be miserable.

Hmm.. on second thought that does have truth to it.. let’s see what other things I chose.

- I chose to not live by a set of personal rules

- I chose to delay understanding in class lessons, not revising everyday, believing that revising too early will lead to me forgetting it later on

- I chose to not follow a study schedule

- I chose to not do the important things as soon as possible in an organized manner

- I chose to spend 80% of my time thinking of inspiring aphorisms that might miraculously ‘cure’ my situation

- I chose to not take direct responsibility for my actions, subconsciously holding a banner that writes ‘ignorance is bliss’

- I chose to ignore common sense and be pulled by strings of the social mirror

And above all, I chose to pretend I did not make all these choices at all.

No wonder I’m miserable.

and to think.. the irony of it all……………….

…

I CHOSE to wonder WHY I’m miserable..

lol

-

The supreme power of choice…  last time I wielded it, almost brought about armageddon. But I suppose I should’ve learnt from past mistakes.. improve my knowledge and skill of wielding this power.. and with time convert it into a force that will accelerate me towards my dreams.

Yea I know I initially wished for a requiem but I do not wish to die yet.

dream as if you’ll live forever, live as though you’ll die today…

Enough of wishing.

It’s about time I accept my responsibilities. Herein lies the beauty of choking.

The world’s oldest living organism is a tree!

I knew it all along. Trees are the secret to immortality, and the elixir of life lies within - the vacuoles! lol

I only slept for 4 hours today. The human body is such an amazing thing. I should expect to feel lightly lethargic throughout this delish day. Then again, maybe not. I always feel very lethargic whether the day is delish or not.

Euphoria. Another step closer towards achieving my dreams. The civic and charity society. We’re going to make a difference! Big expectations.

The smell of death. Bug abdomens unsheathed to reveal the rotting innards. At the time, the smell of rot strikes a dischord with my mental pathways - a dischord like a C# in a C major scale, or a leper amputee punching an ivory piano… you decide! But the bottomline is, death stinks. Add formaline to this evil concoction and one could almost sense Sauron’s presence. (and floating wraiths nearby)

Sweet appeal of dim sum. How you elude me. And all other sumptious food for that matter. These days, all I seem to be able to insert in my mouth looks, smells, and tastes like molotov cocktails. My episodic food memory recalls nothing but sushi… california temaki, inaris, *drools*

Process. The principle of the achievement of everything, this is what it takes. Process. The road from point A to point B may be long, but as the Arabians would have it, a thousand miles journey begins with a single step - and can only be taken one step at a time. One has got to salute their determination though. I bet they used this aphorism to drive themselves through these water forsaken, unhumid and dry deserts. lol. But seriously, redundancy aside, the principle of process is a universally validated one.. and the fact that many people have abided to it and achieved great success, shows how we have the choice to do likewise…

Ah.. aphorisms, these escrows of motivation and truth. How you have run through the ages of men, making lacrimal fluid flow, erythrocytes spill, and food taste oolala. ( I think I’m hungry)

Its just a senseless post. It doesn’t take a genius to figure out that yours truly fresh from bed has the mental sharpness of a tree.. make that a methuselah for that matter. But yea, this is how I chose to start my day today.

Its evident that I’m forgetful. The reason for posting has finally whacked me.

Italy won the world cup!

Yea that’s it, off to school now.. ~